"Catcalling Is Like An Open Call Audition In New York - A Satirical Perspective On The Heinous Sexual Jaunter." By Greg Hernandez

Whenever an attractive woman walks down the street she is unwillingly and unknowingly running an audition.

Let me cover catcalling itself, first. My friend and colleague Natalie Carabello, a contributing writer for my blog conducts her own personal diary of all of the catcalls that she receives.

You can read up on her most recent piece from June here- walking-while-xx-tally-of-street

So, by now you've seen the buzzfeed video on catcalling - Buzzfeed - Catcalling

And you have most likely read this article in the New York post - enough-sanctimony-ladies-catcalls-are-flattering

Catcalling a woman is NOT a compliment. It is a vile form of verbal sexual harassment that is displayed by all types of men. The bums, the young guns, men on the rise, drunkards, low-lives, frat boys, adolescent boys, sexually frustrated men, egotistical men, men in the closet who are posturing, men who cannot maintain an erection, men who do not know the FIRST thing about a woman, etc. Many of these wannabe macho men, who come out of their mother's wombs eventually grow up and want to catcall.

We all know catcalling is a demeaning, degrading and dehumanizing act that exacerbates the already overwhelming number of sexual harassment that women endure on a daily basis.
The sleazy whistles and the creepy "Hey sexy mama, do you come around here often?" stalker mentalities are ubiquitous.

Now, by "we all know," I mean sensible human beings who possess a hefty dosage of empathy. It is nice that we  understand that street harassment needs to stop, but we need those who actually do the catcalling to understand that.

The problem lies in the cognitive dissonance of men. The infuriating rhetoric that comes from men is appalling. They say things like, "Women enjoy the compliments, it is the best part of their day, they like the attention and they dress sexy to get noticed."

This is the type of thinking I will make fun of in this post.

 Now I am from New York City. So I will only be discussing the men from the Big Apple.

Men from NYC are brash. They are relentless in their pursuit of a sexual partner. I met a woman earlier this month in the city. She is from Vancouver, where according to her, women outnumber men 3 to 1 there. It is difficult to date men up there. Even if you do meet a man there is a great chance that he is not decisive, will not make the first move or will not close the deal. This woman I met told me that she gave a man her number  that once. She initiated conversations and eventually asked him out! All out of necessity, because quite frankly the man would say nice things and smile but never follow through on anything. Perhaps he had this one woman figured out. I don't know.

Now I was shocked because this woman is beautiful. She is tall and intelligent, does yoga, she is a single parent with a beautiful three year old daughter. What type of single man, between the ages of 35-45, with good credit, an outstanding disposition and a working cock does not court this exotic beauty? A man from Vancouver that's who. Apparently many of the men over there are like that. Lots of hot women are not getting laid over there. There are too few men. Those few men do not seem to enjoy all of the attention or so my friend told me, are simply...weird.

She went onto to tell me that her time in New York City, albeit very brief, (about ten days) at the time, opened up her eyes to how REAL MEN act. They are not afraid to start a conversation. They are outgoing and aggressive. That is the key. It is in fact a turn on for a woman coming from a place that has such a different paradigm on courting and dating. One could say that New York City women are given far too much attention. Perhaps a migration is in order. New York City women should be taken to Vancouver to enjoy the subtleties of dating there, while Vancouver women need to be brought down to New York City to bathed in attention.

I kid of course. Vancouver women would most certainly grow tired of all the incessant male attention after about a week. This is the mindset. The paradigm shift for men. New York City men court women like its an audition. They swagger up to these women, or at least they think they have swagger, most of them are creeps and spit out their dramatic one-liners and monologues. Garbage that is both rehearsed and improvised. It does not matter. Women are the ones who hold these DAILY auditions. Each sidewalk, corner, alley, train platform, bus stop, store exit, entrance, etc you name it they are the ones who  must walk past these talent less fools.

To their credit, New York City men do not see it that way. Like actors they are obstinate.  No matter how many guys a woman has ignored, turned down, slapped, yelled at, maced, or gotten arrested in one day, there is a man who will look her up and down, lick his chops and stroll up along side her and voice his pleasure (her displeasure) because he believes he is the one that can win her undying affection.

Men in this town view themselves as the modern day Casanovas. Why? More like why not? It is the attitude of the city. Everyone must be important and if everyone is...nobody is.

Still there are some good men out there. Who must try their best to stop their friends, peers, and fellow man from humiliating themselves by acting like degenerates. If you're sober and you're doing this, something is wrong with you. If you're drunk and doing this, you have a drinking problem. Either that or you're lonely.
Men need to be better fathers. Tell their children not to condone this type of despicable behavior that is routinely displayed in this city.

How would a man feel if one of his female relatives was catcalled? We all know the answer to that question. He would be pissed off. How would a straight man feel if a gay man catcalled him. He would lose it.
So let's call out the two-faced men who catcall women and then turn around to point the finger when they're uncomfortable with it.

Women should not have to hold daily marathon auditions for their attention. That is no way to live. Just because you're a small portion of someone's day does not mean that you should impact their lives in a negative way.

I have found the solution to this deplorable act. Keep the catcalls to yourself. You won't meet a nice woman that way. Would you really want a woman that will respond to whistles and poorly worded sentences? Of course that is a silly question, many men will take anything.
How about ordering a prostitute or keeping the filthy ideas inside your head.

Perhaps men should just do this: give a quick glance and think, "MA GOSH WHAT AN ASS," and continue on with your day.

Or they should do one better. Respect women. Treat women how you would like to be treated. It's called equality.

Now I know the argument is, well this is a free country, I should be able to get away with saying anything. As long as I'm not touching her it is not sexual harassment. Wrong! It is! You're disrupting someone's day. What kind of a free country allows that to happen?

Here's a final video Totally Biased: New York City Catcalling